Well it is the last days of summer. Especially since husband starts back with his teaching and my daughter begins Kindergarten. It has been a wonderful summer of spontaneity and traveling and now I'm ready for more routine and structure. This will be the first time in 6 years that I have 3 mornings a week to myself, as my little one will begin preschool. It's not that much time, but it is significant and I am a bit paralyzed by the possibilities. I suppose I'll calm down after a few weeks and not feel that it is so precious.
I'm reading a New Earth by Eckart Tolle. I resisted this for a long time because it seemed so pop new agey. I'm always suspicious of bestselling self help books. But I listened to a thoughtful interview with the author on Krista Tippett's speaking of faith and it made me want to read the book. I have found it very interesting. It's all about the ego and the unnecessary suffering our egos create in ourselves and others. Very thought provoking. Of course, I apply the concepts to my time of discernment and it feeds into my worry that the notion of priest is just an image-enhancing move for myself. But he says that awareness is the first step towards dissolving the ego, so perhaps my awareness of the ego needs of this vocation won't necessarily lead to its dissolution. It's still possible that priesthood is still the best use of my gifts and is truly linked to who I am. But it's also possible that it's not.
Other than that, I'm receiving pressure from the 3 other members of my little family to get a dog. They all really want one. But I'll be the primary care giver and I'm not too excited about the idea. Unless I can fall in love with the little guy. Hmmm....
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The key to a dog - Dog Obedience Training and appropriate crate training! that and realizing that they are puppies for two years, learning and testing all along that time - but then after that - you have a great dog for many years.
I think women are prone to worry about the call to the priesthood being about the "Ego"....but usually its not...the idea of it being about our ego is part of our fear of being a voice of authority...and clearly God is calling women to be voices of authority and we just have to get over our fear of it...
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